Divorce humor quotes

17 funny divorce sayings to get you giggling| worthy

It was a mixed marriage. I'm only upset I'm not a widow. The trick is to find and continue to find grounds for marriage. So, in the spirit of lightening your mood and improving your health, here are 23 funny divorce memes to help you find the humor in what is usually an all-too-serious situation.

Divorce humor quotes

If you live through it, you start looking very carefully to the right and to the left. A new study found that women gain more weight after marriage, but men gain more weight after a divorce.

Bette Davis A divorce is like an amputation: you survive it, but there's less of you. Arguing with a lawyer is like wrestling with a pig in mud.

Margaret Atwood The happiest time of anyone's life is just after the first divorce. Zsa Zsa Gabor My mother always said don't marry for money, divorce for money. Murder, yes, but divorce, never.

That's what happens when you haven't been home in eighteen years. I had to divorce my wife because she was an enabler. Love is grand … Divorce is a hundred grand.

It's got to be weird when a divorce lawyer is fighting for your kids to get custody of you. Carol Leifer I'm not upset about my divorce. Elinor Glyn Search About Wise Old Sayings is a database of thousands of inspirational, humorous, and thoughtful quotes, sorted by category for your enjoyment Featured.

They stay together through anger and hatred and festering misery, just like God intended. Divorce is always good news. But that has happened zero times.

Funny divorce sayings and quotes

Zsa Zsa Gabor A divorce lawyer is a chameleon with a law book. Divorce is the psychological equivalent of a triple coronary bypass. The difference between a divorc and a legal separation is that a legal separation gives a husband time to hide his money. For sale! Lee Trevino She cried and the judge wiped her tears with my checkbook.

17 funny divorce sayings to make you put on a happy face

Let me tell you, after five years of marriage, it is devastating to have the person with the good credit move out. Yet, because divorce is so serious, finding a way to laugh a little can help relieve the tension.

Then there will be at least one man to regret my death. Jack Benny You know why divorces are so expensive?

Funny divorce sayings and funny divorce quotes | wise old sayings

Digorce they're worth it. He wants a no fault divorce, whereas I would prefer to have the bastard crucified. Yeah, the divorce usually takes place after men point out that women gained more weight after marriage. Satan was busy? You should be prepared for anything in divorce proceedings … even the truth.

Funny divorce quotes: 23 divorce memes that (might) make you laugh!

Murder sometimes, but never divorce. Resources Funny Divorce Sayings and Quotes Below you will find our collection of inspirational, wise, and humorous old funny divorce quotes, funny divorce sayings, and funny divorce proverbs, collected over the years from a variety of sources.

Edith Wharton I got divorced recently. If two people were married and they just had a great thing and then they got divorced, that would be really sad. Handelsman A New York divorce is in itself a diploma of virtue.

Wendy Liebman Divorces are made in heaven. I realized I was clutching my purse in a death grip.

Funny Divorce Quotes It is better to have loved and lost than to live with a psycho all your life. Dave Barry In Palm Springs, they think homelessness is caused by bad divorce lawyers. We decided that a trip to Bermuda is over in two weeks, but a divorce is rivorce you always have.